i think i want to listen to them today but i keep coming up with songs. today is just weird. i mean, i don’t feel like writing today but i could just make good stuff all day. like exercise or whatever (analogy) some days you can just, you know, do THAT many push ups.
so, i am really really (besides probably over-caffeinated) inspired and I know i have to sit here and just work. Which makes me crazy. And want to listen to Metallica. And not even for any reason Metallica I would just really like to listen to “…and just for all” which is not really an existentialist crisis.
OH- FOOTNOTE- some one who has a website in Canada, Kara, said my blog is “Bi-Polar” again, (or maybe it is the same person from before…)
Well, Foggy, looks like you need to go see the head-doctor ( f.y.i. “Foggy” that is my blog’s name…shhhh, we are talking about Foggy like he’s not here, like Julia Robert’s famous hair salon scene in Steel Magnolia’s (perfect movie- would have turned into a portal into the sun if MLParker had been in it) .
It isn’t bi-polar. American’s have rather strange days as we do not have socialized healthcare nor are raised with that gentle appreciation of how time might pass “with us”. And I am a workaholic among other things. On a whole, I think the american experience is rather “up and down” as we are kind of born into this “survival of the fittest” “jungle-law” type society- ruled by capitalism. Which puts us on edge. Which makes us a crazy beautiful lot, work obsessed and lost and self-obsessed. Isn’t everybody looking into their life when they are not looking out? Fuck, I hope so. People sure waste a lot of time just sucking up television noise. And I don’t use a television. I wake up and read or make art or write or make songs or meet friends for lunch, or shop. I have to be “doing” something. I like things so much. Really. I do. It is kind of heartbreaking for me to know that about myself. I just love music, people, art. It all terrifies me too.
And as any New Yorker will tell you we are a rather edgy lot (I am not a native New Yorker- but I’m here, and you’ll have to drag my ass off the island which in my opinion makes me eligible). We live in quite a large bustling community among other communities and I think some daily improvising mentally and physically goes into a typical day.
So, maybe you might want to refer to my blog as “real” or “subject to human conditions reflecting a person willing to make a blog, and try, for whatever reason, to make that said thing meaningful and if possible, thought provoking. I choose myself as a willing candidate for my artistic endeavors as I know myself rather well and think it helps steer my art as far away from reactionary/ counter-critical art as possible.
The last thing the world needs is another artist making art about what they don’t like about art.
Fuck that.
Make art about what you like and don’t like about yourself. Then you are getting somewhere sunshine.
XX
(via ryanadams)
i can’t believe i’m re-blogging. but i like what ryan has to say here about…a lot of things. i got my ass handed to me today by my professor — not in a mean way but in a way that really let me know that i have a long way to go before i can ACHIEVE. which means i need to focus more on my writing and less on the stupid shit that life keeps handing me. obviously i have to stay on top of my bills and pay off these stupid collection agencies but i have to focus on my ART (if one can call it that; my best friend is an ARTIST and i am a hack). i want so badly to quit my job so i can stay home and write. but. it’s not possible.
god i need something to CHANGE. i feel like i am wasting my life, realizing that i am wasting my life, and then going back to hiding behind this fluffy pudding exterior.
there are storms rolling through north carolina tonight.
